Speed Dating.

Last Thursday, I did it- I went speed dating. Correction: WE went speed dating (me, Melissa, and her friend). We signed up as a joke... I mean, why NOT go on 18 four-minute dates on a Thursday night?

When we got to the bar, we immediately worked on dressing ourselves in liquid courage. I, of course, was more thrilled that we were about to create some wild tales for ourselves to tell at a later date than to find the man of my dreams, but that's the inner writer/comedian in me. Always better to have a story!

We all sat down at different tables and as the whistle was blown, each guy and girl immediately inundated one another with generic questions like, "What do you do?" And "What is your favorite sport?" YAAAAWN. Some characters were more interesting than others... I found that I was able to put each guy into one of three categories:

1) I'm a bit wanderlust/new to town/kind of interesting and quirky and haven't really had TIME to meet people,

2) I am desperately trying to find a wife,

OR

3) I'm pretty drunk, I'm not quite sure how I got here, and hopefully I'll meet a girl with low enough standards here to take me home.


Yes. It was a real treat.

1.5 hours and four glasses of wine later, I entered my scores on my scorecard and met up with the girls. We took a minor detour ('nough said about that) and after a quick trip to the Chinese restaurant on the corner of my street, I snuggled myself under my covers with my laptop and 8 crab rangoons and entered my votes. OOOOOO......

The next day, the matches came up. All the guys I picked picked me. All the guys Melissa picked also picked her. And I'm pretty sure the same holds true for Cat. You get where I'm going with the caliber of men at this point...........everyone is picking everyone. It's glorious.

So now the emailing has begun and I'm sure that nothing very serious will come of any of this but man oh man it was a good time....for your entertainment, I will recount one conversation with Dave (I have changed his name for his privacy):

Dave: *drunkenly trips over his own foot and sits down at my table, eyes directly fixed on my chest* "I'm Dave." *Takes a swig of beer*

Me: "Dave, how nice to meet you. Tell me about what you do."

Dave: *slurring words* "Noooo, no. I hate those types of questions. Ask me something different, be WILD!"

Me: "Umm, alright then, shrimp or lobster?"

Dave: "Shrimp, there's not enough MEAT in lobster. That was dumb, ask me another one."

Me: "I'm sorry, Dave, all you've done since you sat down is insult me. But let me think, domestic or international?"

Dave:"International. Ask me another one."

Me: *I'm sorry, is this an interview?* "Ok, most embarrassing moment."

Dave: "One time, I was wearing black jeans and giving a presentation and my fly was down so my white underpants were showing." *Laughs, swigs beer*

Me: "Wow, that IS embarrassing." *Ewww, black jeans AND tighty whities? No thanks.* Whistle blows.

And that, friends, is why you TOO should try speed dating.


OHHH and side note, on Saturday night at the Prudential Center Food Court (with Tara and Michelle, mind you), a teenager with a mohawk asked me for a mirror and after I STUPIDLY told him I didn't have he said, "Oh really? Because I can see myself in your pants."

Nice. Love my life.
And the fact that the pickup line was TOTALLY lost on my little Tbone.

:)